calling

I don’t want to lose the moment. Flipping through old family photos, lovingly passed on to me by my mom, at an airport that I can’t remember the name of. The overhead announcer continues to call people back to security checkpoint, reminding them to pick up their lost items. We must be in Tennessee.

“We die the way we live” is something a friend once told me.

I’ve never enjoyed looking back at old family photos. To be completely honest, I couldn’t tell you the reason. Digging deep inside my emotional safe, I speculate as to whether or not I dislike looking back at these photos because I was ashamed of the way I looked/dressed back then – a shallow observation – or perhaps it is because there’s a deep part inside of me that didn’t want to see the roses amongst the thorns of our childhood upbringing.

For several years, I’ve clung to the thorns of this past life; gripping them so tightly that it was a constant reminder of pain and emotion from years past. Revisiting these pictures with a fresh set of eyes and a recharged heart has made me realize it’s time to let go of my focus on these negative occurrences and discover (and accept) the beauty in the childhood that I had, beginning with my mother herself.

Casually flipping through the photos, I turned to a photo of my mom holding me, as a child, and my first thought was “What a beautiful woman” – as she was absolutely gorgeous as a young mother. Stunning.

Thank you, Mom. I love you.

Featured Image From Deviantart

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