Nobody will create an internal personal code of ethics or morals that they are incapable of reaching or attaining. To the writer of the law, all is acceptable and/or permissible so long as it is justifiable. It is only within an external set of moral boundaries that we are held to standards higher than what we believe is possible and/or reasonable.
It has been said that insanity is when one does an action repeatedly with the expectation there will be a different outcome. Am I insane?
I have been thinking that if one is not happy with the circumstances or situations they find themselves in, that it would be reasonable to assume they are doing something that must change. If a drug addict is not happy with their life, it would be reasonable to assume there is a reason why. Same thing goes for the rest of us.
I am Jack’s medula oblongata.
If my theory is right, it can be assumed that one must take an external point of view at their life and assume they are not 100% correct about everything they think they are. This is what I am learning to do right now.
See, I have been all over the place as I have pursued success. However, it has been nothing more than a glorified job of waiting tables; going from table to table – project to project – and cleaning up the tips here and there. I’ve learned to make quite a bit more off each project than the last. However, it has a definite ceiling and breaking point that I’ve discovered.
My trip to New York City was one of the best learning experiences of my life. Since I do my best to learn something from every situation and experience I have, it would be hard to justify it as a failure. My father was also one of the best teachers I have ever had; he taught me many lifelong lessons that I will carry with me to my grave. However, what the New York project and my father have in common is that they taught me what not to do, rather than setting an example to follow.
When I moved, I expected the world and hoped for unparalleled success. It has been quite far from that. Nothing is easy. Nothing is free. Anybody who tells you differently is lying. It was long hours of work that were very rewarding for me. However, the project did not take off the ground as we had hoped/expected. It was rewarding for me because I knew that I had done 110% of my part to see the company to success. For the first time in many months, the mistakes and poor choices were not on my hands and I have been able to step back and objectively dissect and view what went right, wrong, and unexpected in the project.
And for that, I am very thankful. I developed great relationships through the project and established excellent mentors. However, the time has come to now objectively view my own life and realize there ought to be a change.
Sitting across the table from a trusted mentor of mine, I realized it was time to “shrug” and realize I may not know what is best for my life. While I am extraordinarily talented and intelligent for somebody my age, I realize my knowledge only spans the twenty-one years I’ve walked this earth (my first year was spent crawling), and I lack the ability to have the benefit of wisdom that comes with years.
Is it humbling to admit you are not 100% sure you are 100% right? No, it’s not. Sometimes we have the ability to focus on our end goals – of which I certainly possess – but there are many others who may be able to help guide is there better than we ourselves. This is why I am coming under authority and taking yet another leap of faith.
Tomorrow starts a new chapter.
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