Proverbs

When I was younger, my parents had an excellent exercise they imposed on me and my siblings, whenever we watched a new movie; we’d have to write a ‘theme’ on the movie. I didn’t know it at the time, but that skillset has proven to be an invaluable tool as I’ve gotten older.

A lot of people walk through life experiences and rarely stop to examine the moments, asking what the ‘theme’ of a particular experience was/is. In my work life, I call this summary the ‘skinny’ of an event. E.g. here’s the core concept without any of the excess fluff to describe it.

A few months ago, I started a morning ritual where I’d sit down and read Psalms and Proverbs, as well as hand-write one page in my journal. Every day, I stop to look at the day of the month and read that particular Psalm/Proverb. If I’ve skipped any days, I play catch-up until I’m current. It’s a simple practice that works.

Proverbs is the sort of book you can read every day for the rest of your life and still find new value within the 31 chapters. That’s why I picked it as one of the books to read every morning. I picked Psalms because David (author of Psalms) was Solomon’s (author of Proverbs) Dad. Both were kings, and both had a relationship with God that many would consider aspirational, while also being filled with days where they cry out to God for help and mercy.

This morning, I asked myself a simple question:

“What’s the theme of Proverbs?”

The answer was simple:

“The distinction between a fool and a wise man.”

In each of the chapters, Solomon writes about the difference between the proverbial fool and that of a man filled with wisdom.

‘A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise person holds it in check.’ – Proverbs 29:11

Now, why is it important to make a regular practice of knowing the distinction between a fool and the wise? Well, if you see the differences between the two, it helps you identify which person you are more like, and it makes you reflect deeply on who you want to be.

In the woo-woo crowd, affirmations are a popular trend.

“I am light! I am wonderful! I am love!”

What’s missing from reflections in affirmations is the ability to truly soul-search and see examples of who you don’t want to be. Chanting “I am love!” never implores the chanter to question whether or not they have undesirable characteristics, such as opening their mouth too quickly when they are angry. Rather, it just sugarcoats the person to falsly believe they are something they aren’t.

If a car could speak affirmations, no number of “I am a healthy engine!” will gloss over the fact that it needs a regular oil change, inspection and tire replacement as it gets older.

Chanting “My home is clean! My home is clean!” will never erase the cobwebs that creep up in the corners as much as carefully inspecting each nook and cranny for unwanted pests.

Affirmations are much like a pacifier that shuts up a screaming baby. Rather than correcting the outburst-prone child (adult) affirmations simply plug the mouth with something to temporarily occupy the troubled soul, while offering no substance, sustinance or nutritional value.

Wisdom isn’t the sort of gift that comes freely. Rather, it’s a tool box that’s given to people who seek it, with the goal of being used to examine their proverbial engine and make the necessary fixes they discover when all of their ‘engine’ parts are on the floor.

Just as peace doesn’t come from temporary occupation (that’s distraction) wisdom doesn’t come without the seeker being willing to pay a price; exchanging one thing for something that’s better. For example, exchanging the desire to complain loudly at a restaurant because they didn’t like the guacamole (or Ramen) for the choice to keep their composure and calmly order something different.

Anger is a powerful vice. It can shatter dinner plates against the wall when somebody lets their temper fly. However, the fool who lives through their anger will eventually realize one thing; anger takes a tremendous amount of energy to sustain and it leaves the world around them worse off than when they first entered it.

Wisdom, the core competency taught in Proverbs, shows a different path through life; one where each day brings new fruit, each season brings a new harvest and the storehouses of your life continue to deepen as you get older.