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7:16am and I’m wishing i had taken 15 minutes to stop and fill up my rental car with gas before returning it. Part of me feels as if they ought to provide their customers with cigarettes after such a good hard…well, you know.

Regardless, I digress.

DAL>CMH>LGA>DAL. I’ve called all of these places “Home” at one point of my life or another. Leaving from one city to another is never easy. A constant barrage of possibilities and what-if questions that rack my mind.

Home is wherever you make it. From the warming confines of the bar at Thurman’s Cafe, to the scorching heat of an August day in Dallas, it depends entirely on what you make of the situation.

For the first time in several years, our entire family was together in one city. I say “one city” because it was quite impossible to track down all of us for even an hour. We all got something different from this trip, it seems.

In some senses, the world is much smaller than it would appear to be. On the other hand, it can sometimes seem quite large when you’re feeling the void of missing a person, place, or experience.

Starting over. In every sense of the word, I’ve decided to hit the reset button for my life and be intentional about the way I live it, rather than hoping and wishing life turns out on my terms.

I hit a realization that many of the conflict in our family arises from each of us thinking we know better than the other person on how to live our lives. In all reality, the beauty behind our family is that we are so diverse and spread out; from Baltimore to Los Angeles, and a couple places in between, we’ve grown up and moved forward in our lives while maintaining a very strong family bond of love.

It’s a foundation of love and dedication to keeping our relationship(s) intact that has tied our family together. It doesn’t happen by accident.

Leaving and headed on a flight to NYC, I’m a bit bittersweet to leave this place. Columbus, my home of 23 years, no longer feels like home. The excruciating pain of saying goodbye to a brother, headed to Afghanistan, masked by the early morning hours that dull the racing emotions.

Hey blood brother…you’re one of our own. You’re sharp as a razor you’re heart is a stone.

Hey blood brother, you’re bad to the bone. You’re a natural killer in a…bad place alone.

Featured Image From Deviantart

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